Why The Cell Phone Ban Should Extend Beyond The Car


The NTSB is positioning itself to strike a hearty blow to America’s ever-elusive right to “privacy.” This time, it’s by attempting to completely ban cell phone usage in cars, which is totally different than the “No Texting & Driving” campaign we’ve seen over the past couple of years.

Telling drivers not to text while operating a motor vehicle met little to no resistance from the public, mainly because America agrees that you should drive with both hands. Also, it’s probably just common logic that driving the correct way is safer. Once “texting while driving” became illegal-ish (that means ticket worthy), companies sprang into action to manufacture device applications to help you drive by the book whilst running off at the mouth. Over time, though, with a continuing documented increase in distraction-assisted auto collisions & texting tickets being strewn about with no legitimate resolve, the government is stepping in & shifting gears. No pun intended.

Apparently, the previous set of regulations wasn’t stringent enough, because the texting ban didn’t work. Therefore, in true #WelcomeToTheFuture fashion, the powers that be are intervening, proposing an umbrella ban of drivers using any type of cellular communicating device, whatsoever. (Unless its an absolute emergency, thank God.) Hands-free, hands-off, whatever nifty title they use will be illegal, if the law goes into effect.

While I can agree it’s time to implement a bit of forced common sense into society’s frontal lobe, I can’t fully subscribe to an entire activity being yay or nayed according to some secret caucus for safe travels. Even though I’m well aware that such an executive order will be beneficial on a general note, in reality, it’ll be yet another perpetual domino falling, signaling another blow to my rights as a private citizen. Really, though; if the ________ group deems chewing gum while smoking cigarettes unsafe, for example, all they’d need is minimum evidence to present an order to get the activity banned. Now, while that’s a tad bit far fetched, so was SIRI five years ago.

The problem isn’t so much the drivers, but the machines. If the government was serious about encouraging safe driving, they’d steer into the skid, & pair up with companies who can provide the aforementioned hands-free applications & devices at a nationwide-regulated level. That way, filters, governors, timers, etc. could be introduced & a uniform design for talking-on-the-go could be conceivable. Otherwise, this “ban” will just become something else that half the real world will occupy, & most of the internets will flick their proverbial noses at.

At the very least, cell phones should be exiled to outdoors, in the wide open world only, like the great cigarette migration that started in the 90’s. Slowly but surely, public & private businesses began booting smokers out into the street when they wanted to light up, mostly because the second smoke is toxic, but also because the smoke can be quite annoying. (& it eventually became a law.) What’s even more annoying than that? Loud-mouth douchenozzles who really think we care about their STD results or how long they can bone a fat chick. Ironically, cell phone scientists bust their virtual balls to deliver devices that don’t require either party to speak above a whisper, yet & still – in 2011 – 73% of the people who stand less than 5 feet away from me talk into their not-so-smartphones like they were holding a conversation with somebody in the past. (Some soup cans & string shit, if you will.) If there’s a need to oversee phone usage on a grand(er) scale, let this be the starting line where the troubleshooting begins. Not in someone’s vehicle.

Smartphones are engrained into our collective existences. & at this point in civilization, there’s no way to tell mankind to dial it back. Perhaps they need to hurry up & invent those brain implants so we can do away with the phones altogether.


One comment on “Why The Cell Phone Ban Should Extend Beyond The Car

  1. I can dig this…oh yeah but not only are the conversations annoying but whats worse is when you’re talking to somebody and they’re just texting their ass off and ain’t paying attention to nothing you saying. I hate that with a passion. Even worse than that when they got the bluetooth or headphones on and talking to somebody and you at the same time…

    But I must say texting and driving may be the death of me one day… I swear I try to stop lol…


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