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Hip Hop Culture for Grown-Ups

5 Things You Need To Be Considered A True Baller

For those new to this site or however unfamiliar with urban vernacular, a “baller” is an individual who – for the most part – is financially well-off. A baller can acquire his money legally or otherwise, as long as it’s being put to use on a level that all those around him, without cash, will notice his.

As easy as it easy to pretend to be a baller, not everyone meets the criteria or passes evaluations. If you’re not sure where you stand within this issue, take a look at these five things you need to be considered a true baller.

5. The Ability To Deposit & Withdraw Cash From Your Own Bank Account
◦Can’t be a joint account. Has to be yours, that you’re are in total & complete control of. True ballers don’t share pin codes.

4. No Less Than 40 Dollars Cash In Your Genuine Leather Wallet At All Times
◦This way, anytime someone needs change, you’ll have a reason to say “All I got is twenties.” True ballers never have change.

3. A Credit Card That Isn’t A Debit Card
◦All it takes to open a checking account is the legal right to do so & a few dollars. At that point, you receive a debit card with a _______ logo & certain functionality. But, that’s not a credit card, no matter what you say. True ballers are in debt.

2. Never Having To Lie To Anyone, Anywhere, Ever
◦Not the cops or your wife or your boss or a bill collector or your mechanic or your kid’s principal. True ballers call all the shots.

1. Insurance
◦Life & death. Medical & dental. Car & house are bonuses, but they still matter. True ballers actually give a fuck about tomorrow.

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5 comments on “5 Things You Need To Be Considered A True Baller

  1. markdub7
    January 24, 2012

    I am indeed NOT a baller. Thanks Grands….you do wonder for a man’s self-esteem. LOL

    Like

  2. Tony Grands
    January 24, 2012

    “Sorry, broh…” ~ Theodore Evelyn Mosby

    Like

  3. Malcolm Maximillion
    January 24, 2012

    Not a baller at all but I do believe in keeping 40 on you at all times.

    Like

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