5. If done right, the “chase,” or race to achieve a ‘tangwich, can be quite the exhaustive marathon. & by that, I mean that a woman who values her box doesn’t just put a bow on it for any tom, dick, & harry. She’s going to provide some sort of obstacles to test your skill set & stamina, among other things. For the man that endures the trials & tribulation of that time period, lingerie is viewed as an(other) enemy. One more hindrance. Granted, that may be a bit dramatic, but my point(s) remains.
4. Lingerie is the proverbial wrapper to the literal treat we desire. It’s purpose is to advertise the goods, simultaneously allowing relatively easy, yet secure access to said goods. & that’s where it’s importance dwindles. Within seconds packaging is discarded no matter the product, the size of the package nor the beauty of the wrapper. Get it? So don’t take it personal if the floor gets littered with an outfit that never stood a chance, regardless of how long you stood in line to pay for it.
3. No matter how fancy the term, to a dude, lingerie is still really just underwear. & underwear is only as “sexy” as what (or who) is underneath it, if that makes sense.
2. Actual beauty is priceless & dressing it up or down – while awesome as a bonus – is never truly necessary. (Also we know that if we admit to liking it, there’s a good chance you’ll try to get us to go shopping for it with you. No dice.)
1. That money would be better spent on intoxicants, such as ridiculously named weed & firewater. Not only would both parties find pleasure in this, but it completely eliminates the need for cutesy underwear, anyway. Inhibitions couldn’t care less about frills & lace.
In all seriousness ladies; don’t stop spending monies on sexy garbs & other things that make you feel good. By all means, enjoy life. Most guys don’t really think lingerie is a waste per se, it’s just that the hunter-gatherer likes to cut as many corners as possible. (No pun intended.) Rest assured, though, we love your pajamas & loincloths as much as we do your absentee dad issues & backyard detective skills. It’s all a part of the same silly game anyway, no?