Hip Hop Culture for Grown-Ups
I watch a lot of TV. I can almost guarantee that you watch a lot of TV also, especially if you pay a cable or satellite dish bill. Since we watch so much TV, we might as well take full advantage of the idiot box’ offerings, no?
Truth be told, you can learn a lot from TV, depending on your taste. As much credit as the world gives television for negative energy, it’s positive energy can be highlighted just as easily. Depending on what you choose to view, you can learn how to survive socially, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and maybe even financially if you are able to read between the lines. Allow me to demonstrate…
The first show is Cops. Anybody who has watched cops as long as I have knows it’s full of the nuances, life hacks, secret codes, and cheating tips to getting over on or away from “the man.” By watching Cops, not only have I learned how to avoid confrontation or just simple conversation with the police, but if I ever need to escape in a hurry because I have a pocket full of crack rocks and a loaded pistol in my waistband, I’ll definitely know how to get the fuck out of dodge. Or at least off the block long enough to toss my gun and hide my dope.
Another great show to watch, just in case, is Cheaters. There was a time in my life I watched cheaters with a tension of guilt and a slight overcast feeling of stupidity. Why? Because I was a piece of shit. But not only was that a lifetime ago, but that’s neither here nor there. The meat and potatoes of cheaters is getting to witness first hand the inner workings of a woman’s super sleuth intuition. What makes cheaters such a dangerous show is that it allows a woman to the channel, tap into, or final the natural superpower that God gave all of them. I believe a woman naturally has a 7th sense, and cheaters was the lazy custodian that didn’t lock the gate and allowed the wild bull to run free into the audience if that makes any sense. if you’re currently a piece of shit and need some sort of blueprint on what not to do, I suggest you watch cheaters. No, seriously.
Back in the days, I was an unemployed house-husband that watched an ass load of daytime TV. I found myself drawn into Divorce Court. Not only was it oddly relatably entertaining and slightly educational, but I learned a lot about what a woman will accept and what will eventually lead to her being fed up and burnt out. At the time I was unemployed and drinking heavily, so truth be told I was probably watching that show as some sort of homework to make sure I wasn’t going to find my ass on the show’s hotseat. I’ve been married 12 years so far so apparently I learned something from Judge Mableen’s jesters.
Now, if you have children who are teenagers now or will be teenagers in the immediate future, I recommend a few shows just to kind of keep their asses in line. Beyond Scared Straight is corny and it seems somewhat ineffectual in the long run, but if your kid still has any traces of fantasy and whimsy swirling in his subconscious, BSS will grab a hold of him somewhere in his reality.
Jail, a show I believe it’s supposed to be a spin-off of Cops, is basically about the ground level stages of arrest and detention. I think it’s important for children to understand the processes and the mechanisms that must take place in order for one to begin life as a criminal. See, rap songs, TV shows, stupid people, glorify the highlights of being in a productive citizen. But that’s not even half of the lifestyle and what it entails. But I’m getting off course here…
Some days my family and I roll into the house after a collectively long day, and no one turns on the TV. After I get settled in, I usually make a statement like, “All that money I spend on cable? Y’all better find some shit to watch.” They hand me the remote with automatically, and I have no problem with that.
Words by Tony Grands
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