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Hip Hop Culture for Grown-Ups

Quickies: A Brief Yet Effective Look At Possible Hip Hop Fashion Trends Of The Future

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Hip Hop is in a virtual bedlam state now, clothing-wise. Cats are so fashion forward and experimental these days that – at any given moment – you can pluck 5 rappers, put them together in a room, and it’ll look like the cover of a low-budget superhero comic book. Hip Hop has ALWAYS been looked up to for its innovative, cutting edge fashion sense, and this is for good reason. Because it is forever young and influential and intuitive. It only makes sense that we lead the pack when it comes to haberdashery pimping.

We’re almost halfway through 2015 and so far this year I’ve seen rappers wearing blouses, skirts, lady jewelry, and more. And I only expect the unexpected to continue. Here are several predictions on possible Hip Hop fashion trends in the future.

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– Big, loose Basketball Shorts become the gateway that takes us back to baggy clothing, as the culture violently turns on skinny jeans and schmedium tees like it did button-ups and fitted caps just years before. And to bring it full circle, Allen Iverson will finally get his Reebok money and buy the Philadelphia 76ers.

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– The original, uncredited designers of G-Unit clothing join forces to unleash a barrage of throwback jerseys as form-fitting tank tops. 50 Cent – trailblazer of the fashionable form-fitting tank top, if you recall – signs up to be the company’s model spokesperson. His contract will contain a gag order, however, so the company doesn’t get blackballed for industry beef.

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– Basketball jerseys get progressively longer in an obvious attempt to emulate Hip Hop’s not-so-subtle attack on our collective manhood but stop just short of catching on globally when Russell Westbrook finally has sex with a woman and starts dressing like a man. Thus the trend is killed overnight. Literally. Pun intended.

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– With no more room for tattoos, it’s time for rappers to start removing them. Some rappers will opt to undergo full-fledged plastic surgery for fear of looking scaly from removal scars while others, such as Lil Wayne and – ironically – Birdman, will embrace their snake-like appearance and vow to make scar tissue a “thing.”

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– Rappers grow tired of diamonds and fully revolt when Jay Z wears a pearl necklace on TV to accept a Humanitarian award and changes the face (and neck) of Hip Hop fashion. (It was actually Beyoncé’s and he was in a hurry when he reached in the ice bucket. Because they keep their jewels in the same safe. He didn’t do it on purpose.)

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– Hyper-gangsta rap imagery evokes a wave of muscle augmentation amongst the male-driven Hip Hop industry. Like boob jobs for rappers. MCs beef up synthetically and most rappers will credit Dr. Dre as the movement’s founder. Because of the muscle augmentation craze, the throwback tank tops will undoubtedly be big sellers.

Let’s see how accurate I am…

Words by Tony Grands
@Tony_Grands

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2 comments on “Quickies: A Brief Yet Effective Look At Possible Hip Hop Fashion Trends Of The Future

  1. OG Matt Herbz
    May 15, 2015

    What up Tony Grand$, this is your boy OG Matt Herbz sliding through. Been a minute…
    I was doing a google search of my name and found most my old sohh.com shit has been long gone from the internet. My xxlmag.com guest blog was still up though and I’m cracking up reading the comments. Followed a couple of links and here I am.
    I’m too busy these days to do the commenting thing like I used to but it’s good to see people are still out here putting it down.
    Keep up the good fight.

    –OG Matt Herbz–

    Like

    • tonygrands
      May 15, 2015

      BRUH. My dude… Ima need you to stop thru more often, fam. We gotta catch up. Good to hear from you, Matt. Been a minute. Holla. & be safe.

      Like

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This entry was posted on May 8, 2015 by in fashion, hip hop hooray, laugh out loud, quickies, welcome to the future and tagged , .

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