Finally, a dating app for your fists…
Dating apps are the pinnacle of mobile apps. They let you sift through humans until you find one worthy of conversation, select one based on your personal criteria, and if deemed an appropriate next step, it assists you in setting a time and place to meet. If I weren’t helplessly trapped already locked into glorious matrimony, I’d surely be on these more than Twitter or Facebook. Just not looking for a wife.
Today, November 9, at 9:00 Eastern time, an app called Rumblr will be released in a beta version, much to the delight of some thousands of potential users. What’s Rumblr? It’s a brawling app that works much like a dating app. Except the end result will be bloody, random, intentional violence instead of love or baby-making.
Rumblr has been referred to as the “Tinder of impromptu fights. According to a message on its website:
Rumblr is an app for recreational fighters to find, meet and fight other brawl enthusiasts nearby.
The app, which encourages strangers to meet up for random, impromptu street fights, allows for trash talk (it even encourages it), and fight info is publicly broadcast so witnesses can find the crime early other fight fans and potential suitors can come join in the fun-loving fracas. No word yet on the official launch, but if the pre-release buzz is any indication of potential popularity, this will be available for mass consumption my Christmas.
And once it does hit the general public pipeline, prepare for all hell to break loose. It will only be a matter of time before one of these poorly-orchestrated boxing matches banks a hard left and someone gets killed. Humans aren’t smart enough to have these kinds of options so readily accessible. It’s almost feels like a trap.
The beta apps will be limited, but you can attempt to get yours today by logging on to Rumblr’s official website. Do us a favor, though: after your first fight, come back here and give us a review. We’d love to hear from you.
Happy scrapping, fight fans.
Words by Tony Grands